How it started

A smile to remember

One of my most favored family photographs. Taken in Boston on in the 1940’s. My aunt Lillian is the bride with her late husband Bernie. One of three daughters of Henry and Louise Bourque of Everett MA. Pictured behind Lillian to the left is Annette and Henry, my mom and dad. And pictured behind Lillian is Dot and her husband Joe. Why is this photograph my favorite? It’s not only what the eye can see but the story that is hidden in the picture.

A wedding is a celebration of love. The greatest of all emotions. Honestly I think having this photograph is a privilege. To me it is so much more than just a documentation of one day of the lives of two people. A snapshot taken at the happiest moment of their lives, taken at the time of their youth, when their energy is at its peak. It’s spontaneous and relevant sincere and reflective. A whole unknown life ahead of them. Ambitions of a long journey ahead. You have to imagine from their time and perspective. Who do they want to become, and where do they want to go from here. This photo was taken at the time of their new beginning.

As time passes, so do the individuals that had a part in the wedding.. The story diminishes with every passing generation until it has lost its meaning. The story is still there, forever locked in time. To the photograph, time stands still while life moves on. Not all can see its fullness. The last to pass, Dot Callahan on August 25, 2024, seen in the photograph directly behind the Bride. She was the last one who was left to proclaim the photos story. She is also the last of a generation. That has two profound meanings. With the passing of Dot, only the future children not born yet when this photo was taken are left to pass on the story. And second, I and we, are now the oldest generation. My footsteps become heavier. An honor I’m not sure I’m ready for but cordially accept.

For those who want to tell the story, no two stories are the same, we all see something different and unique. What I see is limited from my perspective but also formed from the meaning of who they are to me. There is nothing fictional about the photograph, it represents real life unfolding in front of you and I think that is incredibly powerful documented for all of time. The photo has outlived them and will outlive all of you. How amazing is it to have this one photograph and I’m grateful to have the opportunity to tell you what I see hidden in the photograph. The human connection in a form of art communicating the experience.

Although I was born 3 decades after this photograph was taken, I had the privilege to know my aunt Lillian in my lifetime. The most powerful emotion frozen in this still frame stands as a testimony of her whole life. In the photograph on her wedding day she has the biggest smile. Her gesture has meaning because her smile was the most profound memory I have of her. Every single time she walked into a room or I went over to visit her, I was greeted with the most optimistic smile and cheerful reception I have ever experienced on a consistent basis. She was always happy to see you, always offered you a beverage, a snack, giving what she could. You were always greeted with a welcoming joy and left with a reminder your welcome to come back. Her voice matched her constant smile with adulation and goodness in her heart. In this photograph, her smile literally is forever lasting and a testimony that flourished over her lifetime. The youthful energy and excitement started long before we knew her and never diminished and I’m sure in heaven, her smile is bigger than life.

What else do I want to know about the photograph. A photo is a split second of time. There is no sound and voice that can be extracted. Just curiosity of what was on their mind and what their conversations were about. What did their voices sound like in their youth. How did they dance at the reception. How much did they laugh together. What was the energy like. These were the roaring late 40’s. World war II was over. The beginning of the greatest generation and boom in wold history. A time to be optimistic and the wedding was in Boston, a city every young person with big dreams of the future wanted to be.

My mom and dad are to the left behind Lillian in the photo. The photo reviles something all my life I missed until I saw this photo going through the family album a week after my father died in 2012. I can see into my dad’s smile. A confident, ambitious well dressed young man with an eagerness to succeed in the big city. Unknowing the path he came for in Boston to possibly become a business entrepreneur, which we all know he certainly had the potential for, would soon change. Dad would return to care for his mother and his father’s business in Jackman Maine and never return to Boston. He would become successful in Jackman but much different path than he was dressed up for and the fancy cars in Boston. Other photos of Dad in Boston were consistent with a well adaptive motivated seeker with the propensity to flourish in the city where he met my mother and at the time more than likely planned to stay. Consistent to the dad I know, who was self motivated, disciplinary, creative, always working towards a goal, very hard working, conservative, consistent. All the traits I see in the picture in his 20’s, hidden behind a different attire working in Jackman. If he stayed in Boston no doubt he would have created the next great cabinetry company or something related to fine craftsman. In Jackman Maine, the access and opportunities were quite different.

The dad I know was all those things this picture reviles. The difference in the dad I knew and grew up with wore the same work clothes every day. Several matched sets of the exact same teal green work pants and shirts Monday thru Monday. Only to change to something simple, practical and conservative usually plaid shirt with grey or beige pants going to church or out. He resisted dressing up in fine cosmopolitain and trendy clothing he would have proudly wore in Boston. My mom argued with him to put on even a white shirt and tie for a wedding. In Jackman his cars were practical or for work, minimal accessories, manual windows and an AM radio. Whatever was basically standard. He didn’t like fine restaurants and his choices were always close to what he ate at home, meat and potatoes. His favorite restaurant when he visited me was Cracker Barrel and always ordered smoked sugar cured ham and potatoes. Every time!

Seeing this picture and the contrast interested me to know more. The picture gave me a glimpse into the past. A time before I entered the world. I now understand the difficulty of the decision it must have been to move away from Boston and return to Jackman with my mom. The photo gave me an appreciation for the life they lived. Adaptation and a purpose to thrive wherever life leads. The past shapes your future. Some things established in the early years remain underneath the surface.

My aunt Dot, although in the split second this picture was taken was looking away, she too grew old with a consistent smile and I remember her always happy, optimistic, conversational and the more sophisticated of the three likely because she remained in Everett. To us in the northern woods of Maine, aunt dot was from the city and we loved her differential Boston accent and stories of metropolitan culture I knew nothing about. The three girls all shared the same love of reading, puzzles and cards and board games with their friends. They all loved visits and lengthy conversations. They all dedicated their lives to serving in the church and compassionate to others. I still hear echos of laughter as the three sisters sat together building puzzles in their youth of yesterday. They gave us a lesson that is never out dated, to look at others with kindness.

I can tell from the clothes they are wearing, the shadows and the reflection on their faces, the wedding day was in the summer and in the mid of day. The sky was just right to cast a shadow under the cars but soft enough not overexpose their faces with bright sunlight. A perfect day for a photographer. The day also represents the youthful spirit of not just one but three sisters in one frame.

The last thing I am grateful for is how my inspiration to create forever lasting wedding videos came about as a result of this single picture. The first thought when I saw it that came to mind, if this was a video, I would be able to hear the voices of my mom, dad, aunts and uncles. I would have a better sense of the the most wonderful day of their life. Hear them laugh, tell jokes, talk about their futures, see them sprint to catch the bouquet, twist and turn on the dance floor. Everything that is real and so I could share the experience like I was there. I began a hobby of creating wedding videography as a result of this picture. To pass on a memory, so future generations, can experience its fullness. What I found out not long ago, my grandfather was very passionate about photography and 8mm film video. I believe he may have taken this photo. There’s no end to what this photo will revile outside its borders and how it connects us to the past. The photographers passion and reflection of what he saw at the moment would become someones most valuable possession. His work inspired a future into the art of photography and videography appreciated 80 years later into the future.

The wedding day is the greatest memory unfolding. It's not a script you write but real life genuinely happening. The beginning of a well documented story that will never be forgotten for all of time. It is as real today as it was when it was happening. This photo is a tapestry of time. Their story resides in our hearts. You have a responsibility of the oldest generation living and a calling to pass on their spirit and reputation of kindness to others, smile through life, make the best with what you have and above all faith in the Lord. We are Gods children created through them. We are thankful for longevity and personality traits genetically passed on to us. We are still connected. They taught us to wake everyday with something to do. If you knew one of the sisters, you knew all of them. We will miss them but we will go on with memories we have. They are now home and that will be in the next story...

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